Have Fun, Repair Your Own Computer?

FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK

Humor & Satire

By Asta Dido

 Sorry, this is not going to be the definitive manual for computer repairs just some tips for the care and feeding of your Personal Computing device a notch or two below anything printed for dummies.

 Now, I’m a retired Computer Teacher and I’ve been “doodling” with these ferslhugginer machines for quite some time. How old am I you ask? Well, I’m 74 years old and aside for a brief run-in with computers  in the USAF, Strategic Air Command, scoring target hits of atomic bomb runs on major US cities (surprised?) in a fortified cave in Tucson Arizona in 1953 under Davis-Monthan AFB with a computer as large as modern High School Gym and so primitive by today’s standards that your Personal Data Assistant (PDA) has more computing power and your laptop even more by far!Yep, that long!

 Now my timeline becomes fuzzy (I guess age has something to do with it) as with most Senior Citizens I can remember certain things in a very far distant past—say even 60 or 70 years ago with clarity but, don’t ask me what I had for dinner yesterday. The reason I say this is that I will jump to using one of the first “portables” the K-Pro’s and a Tandy TL-2 pre Microsoft DOS or Disk Operating System. And I would place this sometime in the fun 70’s.

 OK, so now you have some of my credentials let me get down to the “nitty-gritty. First is what I call “Rule 1001!” You have a computer and it’s running swell and LoL. Yes, laugh out loud! There are things you do repeatedly and all works well until the 1001^st time, then kablowie! Your computer freezes or you get the dreaded “blue screen” or, your computer stops working completely! What a horror--especially if you forgot to "save" your work!

 Before calling a computer repair guy who’s apt to charge you a king’s ransom try this. Turn off the computer and restart it—as simple as that!

 That didn’t work so remove all the peripherals; the printer, modem, scanner and so on and try it again. This usually works. Check you electrical outlets as well especially if you have toddlers, dogs, cats and chimpanzees. Also, read your screen it will usually tell you what’s wrong and here is where the advice I give you is worth its weight in diamonds and platinum—get thee to the internet and search by typing in the problem into a good search engine like Google or Yahoo. I can’t begin to tell you how many times this has helped me and saved me bundles of cash. Avoid those web sites that want to charge you or want you to join something—free advice abounds; just find one that uses clear and simple language that you can understand. Chances are that many have suffered with your very same problem and are willing, from the goodness of their hearts, share and offer advice how they fixed their PC’s.

 Here’s what you don’t want to hear: your computer, just like you, ages and when it start complaining, wheezing, making strange noises and slows to a maddening crawl it might be time to set it out to pasture or sent to recycle heaven! Computers nowadays are so cheap it doesn’t pay to repair them! Just throw that old heap away and pick up a good and space saving laptop or one of those new desktops with a flat panel display and contribute to the well being of our economy! Just remember to stay GREEN; mother oith will love you fer dat…

 

Asta Dido is the pen name of Sam DiBernardo, Candidate for The New York City Council, District 32 Queens, NY

 Email      forlearning@hotmail.com